MIKE: What the hell is going on?
SUSAN: Well, I lost my earing and the girls here were kind enough to help me look for it.
BREE: Oh, there it is!

Lynette: This is my old college roommate, Renee.
Bree: Hi, it’s so nice to finally meet you. Lynette has talked so much about her friend from college.
Renee: Oh, yes. You know how in school the pretty girls always hang out together? Well, I refused to go along with that.

Bree: We’re your friends. Why would you shut us out?
Lynette: I just liked being able to throw on my wig and join you guys for a cup of coffee and a good gossip about the new neighbors. You know, for five minutes I could pretend I wasn’t a sick person. But once your friends know you’re sick, you can’t pretend anymore. Cause you can see it in their eyes. The fear, the pity.
Susan: Is that all you see in our eyes?
Lynette: No, no, of course not. You know what, let’s make a pact. No more secrets. From now on we tell each other every shocking detail of our lives.
Susan: I’m in.
Gabrielle: Me too.
Lynette: You with us?
Bree: Absolutely.
GABY: You and Tom will survive this.
LYNETTE: Yeah? How can you be so sure?
GABY: Because some marriages were built to last.
DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES 03.02 - “It Takes Two”
LYNETTE: Tom and I are separating.
RENEE: No, no, no, no, no. Not you guys.
LYNETTE: It’s alright. I think it’s for the best.
DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES 07.23 - “Come On Over For Dinner”

Susan: I don’t want to get emotional, but just being here in my own kitchen with my best friends..
GABY: I kissed Tom and it was a harmless joke. I think if I had kissed anybody else’s husband, they would laughed and then forgot about it ten seconds later.
LYNETTE: Okay, let’s test that theory.
[LYNETTE STARTS MAKING OUT WITH CARLOS]
GABY: See? I don’t care. That’s just a waste of time… and spit. Okay, okay, okay, okay, I get your point.